Monday, December 19, 2016

Things I Have learned While Confined to Bed

One thing that happens when I'm sick in bed is that I watch a lot of terrible day time television. This means this time I have learned that many advertising writers think we are idiots.

For example because it's Christmas we have gift suggestions. Oh dear heaven do we have gift suggestions - and what suggestions they are.

A few examples:
Apparently what we all need above all else are items for personal grooming because it's always nice to be reminded that we are not taking care of ourselves. Our hair looks so terrible we need ways to improve it, we are not doing enough to remove unwanted body hair and our feet are such a mess we absolutely need to have special devices to remove the rough parts - and yes, there have been ads for all these. Obviously we would appreciate presents that remind us of these failings because we are either too incompetent or too mean to supply ourselves with these necessities or haven't realised what a mess we look.

Then, of course there are the always welcomed household appliances. Nothing says Christmas like an iron, microwave or vacuum cleaner.

Or perhaps you'd like to receive a garden hose with special fittings - because you're either incapable of watering a garden properly or haven't been trying hard enough and your garden is dying.

All of these are products I've seen advertised as suitable Christmas gifts but how anyone could have thought any were a good idea escapes me.

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